How to deal with losses.

dear bloggers

I lost my father last month. I have nothing much to say but if u want tips on how to heal from it, I too need help on that hehee.

But time helps. but we all know that.

for those who are experiencing what i am experiencing, u might notice that after some time, (duration varies with psychological strength) u become better, u can smile, joke, n do ur daily activities as usual.

But! a phenomena which i call the sadness-attack will happen to u from time to time. its like a heart attack. u suddenly thought about the sad part of it n cant stop crying. u cam literally feel the pain in ur heart. it hurts. but i promise u it will happen less and less over time.

Some people may feel very guilty to move on, to be happy again because they dnt want to abandon the one they have lost. i wanna say to this type of people that, if the one u lost can still talk to u they would say, "pls dont let my death affect ur emotion, because i love u, i dont wanna see u sad. Because seeing u sad hurts".

u will find urself avoiding thinking about the one u lost, usually because u dnt wanna cry. but if u find time and emotional energy one day, get ur mind and heart to feel the pain, because emotions cant be kept like that, its not healthy. it will get better in time.

God is always with us. human suffer on earth n those who left us first, are in a better place right now. have faith.

love
rebecca

In a pondan's heels

And then life goes on...

I just saw my friend's facebook status and it got me thinking.
My friend is gay, u know that typical what u call 'pondan' in Malaysia? he/she posted this.

"Hari ni cantik tarikh kan.. 11.12.13... sekali seumur hidup ja kita rasa ni.. semua org sibuk da maw couple d tarikh ni..yg maw kawin pun ada.. tp,sy??? mcm biasa... Bersendirian terussssss... tiada yg special pd tarikh ni.. hmmmm.. kecian..
#YgpentingLifeMustGoOn#" 

it is just a typical facebook post but..it really did got me thinking. 

I kept saying that my life was hard and kept saying that i cant wait for it to end, life sucks, but look at that! Imagine being a pondan in Malaysia, ur longing for another man and all men are just disgusted by u. Even if u get a man, u cant go public or people might get grossed out or you might get mocked by a bunch of so-called-real-men ass holes. 

Everywhere u go, whoever u are with, people will always look at u with such negativity. and imagine being a Muslim pondan! all the people of the same faith want to burn u alive! and your own family, I dont even wanna go there.

And then suddenly! my life isnt that hard at all! their lives are! the pondan in Malaysia. 

Gosh if u think of pondans, well I dont know about u guys, but when I think of them the first thing that comes up to mind is a bunch of pondans laughing, talking loud, walking sexy, attracting attention, well ive never seen them sad before. 

HOW THE HELL CAN THEY BE SO STRONG?? =( im sad just thinking about it. 
According to my friend's post, he is lonely. well, need i not to explain why, we all know pretty much enough. 

I dont have a point in this actually, well, maybe i do, my point is, no matter what happens, how bad it goes, how unbelievably terrible life happens, life goes on man. 

If a pondan with such hard life can stay strong, why cant we right? so fight until u die, just keep on moving forward because, life goes on. 

ANOTHER point, fuck homophobia. screw all those who think that they are real men who mock and make fun of gay people. If i put those guys in the gays' shoes for just one day, they might kill themselves already. Because they are not strong at heart, like the gays are. 

Who's the pussy now? think about it. Well, but it all comes to..life goes on.   

-end-
ya thats it